I got a call from a friend a couple weeks ago. “Say, we’re going skydiving for my birthday, want to go?” Immediately, I noticed my mind making pictures of a fatal crash and could feel my body in a panic. So of course I said, “YES!”
When I was a kid, I had an incident that left me with a phobia of heights. Fourteen years ago I did a tandem skydive and it went away, I thought. Even though I was sitting in my chair, safely in my home, it’s funny what the mind does, isn’t it! In that moment, I connected with the truest part of my and said to myself, “I’m not going to live like this!” and “YES” was my answer. If you’ve ever had a phobia, it happens and an instantaneous all over body sensation. The body automatically goes into a mode to protect itself, or so it thinks.
Why is this important? We all have fear! Many people don’t want to call it that. But as a coach I’ve found it incredibly freeing for people to admit they are afraid. Typically, you’re either loving something, or afraid, every other description is a cover up. Fear is “the anticipation of pain”. If you think there will be any pain, and you’re avoiding something, that’s fear!
So what are you afraid of? Maybe it’s talking to a special someone? You hands get sweaty, the mind is flashing up pictures of failure. Maybe it’s starting a business, making a phone call, maybe just managing your money regularly? When you feel the pain before you’re even starting, that’s fear. The magic hear is that fear is made up in the mind and what you’re afraid of, when you go into it, will dissipate. The best way to eliminate fear is to go into the fear directly. The secret is that fear usually hides a great gift for you. Notice fear and let that be a trigger to “dive” right into it to reveal more freedom.
Here’s a video of my jump. Maybe you’ll do something this month you’ve been afraid of and regain more freedom and power.
By the way, notice the chute I pulled out and the one I landed with are different colors! My fear wasn’t of heights but of a parachute malfunction, and that’s what happened. No problem thought, this is a very safe sport and my reserve chute worked great, although one lands quite fast with it. Interesting how we can manifest our fears, but staying present, the fear isn’t problem. Moral: have a backup plan then focus on having fun!